Is the Quest for the Perfect Morning Routine Overrated?
Well, it's the day of the cast party. My last obligation in this string of too-much-on-the-calendar (and on my task list). Life has been a little jumbled lately. I've been neglecting basics like laundry, and at the same time doing things that are unnecessary, like signing up to co-chair the drama club cast party. Why can't I just donate a case of water and some cookies like a normal mom? Lol.
When I start to feel brain fog, a desire to avoid social events, and just a general difficulty relaxing and enjoying life, I know it's time to re-center. And what better way to start fresh than to develop the perfect morning routine?
Here's the thing, though. I've tried. Many times. I can keep up a solid routine of journaling, stretching, and running for about a week — and then it gets pushed out when I have to stay up late to transport teenagers, or we get home from a concert at midnight, or I set a task list that's way too ambitious. The staples of my health easily get squeezed out. And when they go, so does my ability to think clearly, pace myself, and say no to the cast party co-chair position.
That's actually my point here. It's not exactly about how to say no. It's about designing a routine that protects your health and wellness habits so thoroughly that you naturally show up to your days in a clearer, more grounded state — and from that place, you're simply better equipped to schedule wisely, take on only what you can handle, and protect what matters most.
So let's figure this out together: I'll show you how to actually figure out what works for YOU, by designing MY new morning routine right here and now on the page.
What’s ideal?
What actually fits? How can we bring it together so starting our days is easier and more life-giving?
Why My Morning Routines Keep Failing
Here's a partial list of things I've included in past morning routines: Morning Pages, journaling exercises, coffee, vitamins, reading, meditating, walking, running, yoga, at-home strengthening, going to the gym, smoothies, gardening, butter-coffee, work projects, home chores, breakfast.
Not all at once — obviously. But clearly, even a curated version of this list would take longer than a full 8-hour workday. And in the wisdom of my fifth decade on the planet, I know that several of those are simply not happening. (Ahem. The gym.) Others — like chores and work projects — are terrible morning routine choices for me personally, because I won't be able to stop. I already have momentum…I could just use some chill. Knowing yourself is a big part of designing an effective routine you can actually stick to.
Have you heard of The 5am Club by Robin Sharma? He uses a goofy cast of fictional characters to make the case for waking at 5am and spending the first hour of your day doing 20 minutes of movement, 20 minutes of reflection, and 20 minutes of education. Corny as it is, I've listened to it multiple times and attempted to follow it. And here's what it gets right: it's just one hour, it's flexible and customizable, and it hits the three components that genuinely balance me out. However, 5am means a 9pm bedtime — and I have teenagers who occasionally need me after 10, or we're pulling into the driveway from a school rehearsal at 10:15. Starting at 6 or 7am instead? School wake-up times eat that hour up too.
So let's drop The 5am Club for a moment and build something from what I actually know to be true.
What I Know for Certain - From Paying Attention to my Past
Exercise just HAS to be part of my day for my best energy and long-term health. I’ve ignored that all winter and I feel the consequences. Writing and reflection keep me untangled — I think more clearly when I'm doing it consistently. And I carry a truly absurd amount of muscle tension in my jaw, face, neck, and shoulders. It's a mental stress I'm placing on myself — a spinning mind that's always looking ahead instead of being here in the moment. It's painful, and I have to address it before it gets worse. I'll be fifty before you know it, and I want to be healthy and free from self-inflicted medical issues.
And here's the thing — there's actual science behind why these habits matter so much. A 2024 randomized controlled trial published in Scientific Reports found that a walk outside improves executive attention — your brain's capacity for higher-order thinking and decision-making — above and beyond what exercise alone provides. Something about being in a natural environment allows your brain's attention systems to genuinely rest and reset, rather than constantly filtering the noise of everyday life. And Dr. James Pennebaker's decades of research at the University of Texas shows that expressive writing frees up working memory — essentially clearing mental clutter so your brain can focus on what actually matters. In other words: the morning walk and the Morning Pages aren't just feel-good habits. They're literally tuning your brain for better thinking. And better thinking leads to better decisions about your days — including which obligations deserve a yes, and which ones just do not.
Now onto the practical part - implementation. Here I had two crucial realizations: First, not all of this needs to happen in the morning. Second, none of it needs to take very long.
Getting Granular
So here's what actually fits my life right now: I could wake up at 6am, make coffee, and do Morning Pages for 30 minutes. Julia Cameron describes them as three long handwritten pages of free-writing, right when you wake up — clearing the cobwebs before the content of the modern day floods your brain. Then I wake up my daughter, and while she's getting ready and doesn't need me, I can make breakfast and read for 15 minutes — something with substance, ideally analog. The next stretch of my morning is devoted to getting her to the bus. Then she's off, and I get outside. A walk or a run, followed by 15 minutes of weeding when I get home. Already sweaty, so why not be productive and clean up the garden…which is super satisfying in short bursts.
Do you see how granular you have to get to find something that actually fits your real life?
The Part I Almost Missed
I was still missing something — meditation, stillness, the quiet slowing-down habits that I know I need. My coach recently asked me: Do you have to center your body before you throw pottery on the wheel?
Yes, I told her. Definitely. I start with my feet, then hips, torso, shoulders, elbows, hands — and then a slow deep breath. If you rush in without being physically aligned, your piece will be pulled off center. Ruined.
She suggested doing the same thing throughout the day — intentionally slowing down between activities, even pausing mid-task to recenter. Physically and mentally. This was immediately familiar to me on a neurological level. And I realized this was the missing piece — that I could actually manage. Not a longer morning routine, but micro-moments of centering woven through the whole day.
In the middle of a busy day…
We can still pause, sit back, and take a few centering breaths. Instead of slowing us down, it renews us.
My Not-So-Morning Wellness Routine
Wake, coffee + Morning Pages
Breakfast + 15 minutes of enriching reading
Walk or run + 15 minutes of weeding
Mindful centering moments throughout the day
And stay flexible — for example, #3 might be a 10-minute dog walk and pulling three weeds on a busy day. The point isn't perfection. The point is consistency. Because when these four things happen with any regularity, I think more clearly. I feel more like myself. And from that place — a grounded, rested, physically well version of me — I'm a whole lot better at deciding what actually deserves a spot on my calendar. Including whether or not I should co-chair next year's cast party.
And maybe I will! If it’s right for me at that time. After all, I’m hoping to be a much healthier me by this time next year.
Quick Win: Pick ONE of the four elements above and do it tomorrow — just that one thing. Morning Pages, a 10-minute walk, or one mindful pause mid-afternoon. That's enough to start.
Solid Solution: Map out your week and protect small windows for your top two non-negotiables. Treat them like appointments you can't cancel — because they're with yourself.
Treat Yourself: My one-on-one coaching is in development! If you're craving a personalized creative and wellness framework that actually fits your real life, reply and let me know you're interested. I'd love to connect.
With Enthusiasm for Life + Art,